52 in 52

In my last Not Me! Monday post, I made brief mention of the fact that I've been contemplating starting a second blog. Here's the scoop...

The second blog that I was thinking about starting was going to be a weight loss blog, because the thing is...

I'm fat.

I know that's a terrible thing to say about one's self, but you see...

I'm fat.

And I've hard a really hard time coming to grips with the fact that...

I'm fat.

Up until I had kids, I was thin and in great shape. What's strange is that I still feel like that person, except when I do anything physically strenuous.

Like walk up the stairs.

Okay, so I'm totally kidding about that one.

It's just that it's strange to feel like the "old, skinny" me most of the time, only to see a photo of myself or see myself in the mirror, and thus be reminded that I am no longer that "skinny" person. Not even close.

That's why one of my 2009 New Year's resolutions* is to embark on a journey to "Lose 52 pounds in 52 weeks". 52 in 52. Granted, 52 pounds is a bit of a lofty goal for two reasons:

1. Losing 52 pounds would put me back at a weight that I haven't seen in many years. It's a weight that my post-four-pregnancies body might not be capable of seeing again, and that's okay. But I'm going to try anyway.
2. I'm nursing Aniston, which means that I need to be careful to not lose too much weight too fast. That's going to be hard, because when I have to limit my weight loss to 1 pound per week (recommended weight loss rate for nursing women), the progress seems so slow, and I get easily discouraged.

But, nevertheless, the fact remains that I'm fat. And I'm displeased about that fact. And it's high time I did something about it. That's why I was going to start a second blog. It was going to be a way for me to chronicle my weight loss journey, and also a place to share weight loss advice and tips for others struggling with their own weight issues.

But let's be real. I just don't have the time for a second blog! Shoot, I hardly have time for this one, but I make time for it because it's one of the few hobbies that I allow myself to partake in. Plus, it's the only way I have found to keep up any form of a journal.

So, instead of starting a whole new blog, here's what I'm going to do:

I'm going to chronicle my weight loss journey on this blog instead. Once a week, on "Fitness Friday", I'm hoping to share a little bit about my journey, as well as tips, recipes, scripture, music, etc. Anything that pertains to being fit on the outside, and on the inside.

So, why on earth would I want to put this embarassing part of my life out here on my blog?

It's simple. I need accountability, and I need motivation. And the knowledge that I will be providing all of you (all 6 of you?) with a weekly update on how I'm doing (or not doing), is one of the best ways that I can think of to keep myself motivated and accountable.

Chris and I also set up an incentive program for me. Wanna hear about it?? (Just say yes.)

After losing my first 15 pounds, I get a new haircut and possibly new nails. When I've lost 25 pounds, I get an entire day to myself, either leaving the house, or having the house to myself. It's my choice. And if I hit the magical 52 pounds? I get a new wardrobe! Well, duh. Of course! If I lose 52 pounds, I'll need a new wardrobe! I threw away my skinny clothes a long time ago.

And now I would love nothing more than to be confident enough (and thin enough) to throw away my fat clothes. Once and for all.

So here I go. Once I hit "Publish", there's no turning back...

*Fun fact: I made 9 resolutions for myself for the year 2009, and that doesn't include the ones made for Chris and I as a FAMILY/COUPLE. Talk about setting myself up for failure, huh? But I've already surprised myself by crossing a couple off the list. And I still have 10 months left to accomplish/begin the rest. All hope is not lost. Yet.